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Women Blossom Blog

What Some Other Mom Does, But You'll Never Do?

9/12/2020

5 Comments

 
No mirror ever became iron again. No bread ever became wheat again. What is the importance of mother in child development?  You may already hear about the below old story:
​When the child was 3 years old:
He tripped over a stone in the yard and fell, crying.
 
Mom A:
Did you get hurt? Damn this bad stone! Don’t cry baby (she was desperate to stop the child from crying).  The child cried even harder.  In his understanding, the false was the stone.  He felt pity for himself.
 
Mom B:
​Stop crying! I will beat your butt harder if this happened again!
The child learned to responsible for his carelessness.
 
When the child was 4 years old:
The child won’t eat the meal while watching TV for hours.  He threw a tantrum when his mom urged him to eat the food.
 
Mom A:  
She served the child as a baby by putting the food in the child's mouth (to avoid the dropping food stain the clothes).  The child thought that life was so effortless.
 
Mom B: 
She told the child, “If you don’t come to eat now, I will take away all the food.  You get no food to eat until tomorrow.”  The child learned to responsible for his misbehavior.
 
When the child was 6 years old:
The mom made a deal with the child that she would buy him one toy only. The child got an iron man.  After a while, he attracted to another toy and urged his mom to buy the second toy for him.  His mom rejected, the child was crying loudly, stumbled on the floor.
 
Mom A:
She felt embarrassed, gave-in to buy the second toy for the child. The child knew his strategy works regardless of promise.
 
Mom B:
She told the child, “I won’t buy it. The deal is a deal. Get out of here now.”  The child learned to responsible for his choice.
 
When the child was 8 years old:
The mom did everything for her child by keeping the child inside a protective bubble to spare her a lot of anxiety.
 
Mom A: 
The mom didn’t allow the child to wash dishes to prevent he broke the dishes up.  The child never got a chance to participate in cooking because she feared the child would burn himself.  When the child tried to wash his bag, his mom washed it for him as she worried the bag would not clean enough after washing.
 
The child presumed that there was a lot of things he couldn’t handle by himself.
 
Mom B:
She taught her child how to wash the clothes to make it clean;
How to wash the dishes to prevent breaking them;
How to hold the hot food without burning himself.
 
The child learned how to take responsibility for himself in his daily life.
 
When the child was 10 years old:
Mom A:
She arranged to schedule numerous learning courses for him to be the stepping stone for winning in school.
Learning was so painful caused him to hate schooling.

Mom B:
She told the child the key to studying was hard-working and concentration.
She allowed him to play after finishing the homework.
She encouraged him to read more books during his spare time.
 
The child learned to responsible for his interests and hobbies.
 
When the kid was 13 years old:
The kid played a ball in the garden and broke the neighbor’s window.
 
Mom A: 
She took him to apologize for the accident with the payment of compensation.  After then she complained about the neighbor to take advantage of the accident to blackmail her.
 
The kid thought it was no big deal to get others into trouble as long as you paid them money and apologized.
 
Mom B: 
She took him to fix the neighbor’s window. The payment of the compensation deducted from his pocket money. 

​The kid learned to responsible for his wrongdoing.

When the kid was 15 years old:
The boy asked his mom to buy him a piano.
 
Mom A:
She accepted. He got bored with playing the piano and never touched it after one year.  The boy regarded he could get what he wanted, even if he had no money.  He didn't know that his mom took three years to clear the debt for buying him the piano.

Mom B:
She hadn’t bought him a piano.  Instead, she bought him a harmonica.  She told her boy she would buy him a piano unless he was good at playing harmonica.  The boy obsessed with the harmonica and never thought about buying a piano again.

The kid learned to responsible for his insistence.

When the boy was 19 years old:

Mom A:
She told him to study law in university in order to secure a promising career path.  The boy used to follow what his mom told me to do. His mom wanted him to study in law school was because she wanted him to redeem her broken dream.
 
Mom B:
She gave him opinions to decide which subject he should study at university, and told him the decision should base on his interest.
 
The boy learned to responsible for his future.
 
When the boy was 20 years old:

He asked his mom to give him money to buy an expensive mobile phone so that he could call her at ease.
 
Mom A. 
She accepted. The boy regarded his mom as his ATM and totally neglected her desired to receive his call.
 
Mom B:
She told him the old one was still working well.  If he wanted so much to buy a new one, he should use his own money.  The boy worked a part-time job to get the money to buy a new phone. The new phone carried a sense of achievement more than the satisfaction from the phone.
 
The boy learned to responsible for what he wanted.
 
When the boy was 24 years old:
 
Mom A:
She helped him to find a job through her connection. He’d no idea she contacted so many peoples before he could get his job.  The boy didn’t require to do any hard work. The job came to him effortlessly. He regarded the world operated as all gain, no pain.
 
Mom B:
The boy wanted to start his own business. His mom told him to work somewhere to gain more job experience before starting a business. Two years later, he raised the issue again. His mom told him to go ahead unless he could handle the worst-case scenario. She lent him the initiated capital and requested him to pay her back within four years. He accepted the deal and promised to buy her a house as a bonus.
 
The boy learned to responsible for his career.
 
When the boy was 27 years old:
 
Mom A:

The boy changed girlfriends frequently. The girls complained he was an irresponsible person.  His mom told him he was perfect.  Those girls were not justified to be his partners.
 
Mom B:
The boy brought his fiancée to meet his mom. She told him he deserved to get this beautiful woman to be his wife. As long as they loved each other, she would be happy.  

​The boy learned to responsible for his relationship.
 
When he was 32 years old:
 
Mom A:
The boy got a huge debt. His mom helped him to pay all the debt from her retirement fund.  He knew that his mom would help him to solve all his problems.
 
Mom B:
His son’s business was a success.  Not only did he pay her back all the money, and he also bought her a house to fulfill his promise.   She burst into tears.
 
​He learned to responsible for his promise.
 
When the boy was 35 years old. 

​He killed a person and put to jail for life.  His mom blamed everyone and asked why God had to punish her.
 
You can guess what the story is trying to tell.
 
No doubt mom A loved her son and wanted him to be happy.  She did everything to protect her son from taking his own responsibilities.  Her adult child won’t grow up until it was too late when everything couldn’t reverse.

What are the best pieces of parenting advice ever? Tough, love, forgiving, or anything else.  What some other mom does, but you will never do?  What parenting advice you don’t believe?
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5 Comments
Sonia Seivwright link
9/15/2020 12:31:19 pm

I get what you are trying to say here but at the end of the day, all mothers or parents, just want the best for their child and we all learn along the way.

Reply
Simplylove
9/16/2020 02:16:16 am

Absolutely agree. All parents embrace good intentions and want their children to be happy.

Reply
Anitra link
9/15/2020 03:09:32 pm

Interesting read...I wouldn't say that parents are bad, I would say that they just need help with learning positive parenting tips

Reply
Simplylove
9/16/2020 02:23:40 am

Apologize if I use the inappropriate term. No doubt all parents carry the positive intention to their children. I use to continue learning how to be a better mom.

Reply
Rella
9/16/2020 07:34:49 pm

This is such a great way to show perspective. There is no one way to be a mom is what I am learning. You have to do what is best for you and your family.

Reply



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    Catherine

    Digital marketer, writer, editor,  feminine optimistic style, pursuit of happiness, addict to coffee.

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