Use Enneagram to Understand the Drives of Your Child that You May Not Know (Seven to Nine)

An enneagram is a powerful tool that helps us to understand the personalities and drives of behaviors. It can be regarded as one of the perspectives to understand our child better and become a more effective parent. We'd covered One to Three. And Four to Six in the previous post.  Let's continue to check Seven to Nine.

7. The Epicure

Playing and making fun is their strength.  They are enthusiasts for entertainment, want to have fun, to keep themselves excited and occupied.  They use to come up with many creative fun ideas to make people laugh.  You will never be bored with them around.

Key Motivation

The drive is having fun.  Get fun is a way to avoid and discharge pain. They want to maintain their freedom and happiness, to avoid missing out on worthwhile experiences.

Parenting Tips

1. Appreciate and make use of their creativity for generating so many fun ideas for the family and others.
2. They are not uncommon to procrastinate their work by shifting attention from time to time.  Train them to follow through on their work and finish what they start.

8. The Protector

Tom always appears resistant, want to dominate, and to stay in control of his situation.  He is a challenger to resist unfair situations or persons.  His mom describes him as a volcano ready to erupt anytime by yelling, screaming, or non-stop arguments. In their world, they want to prove their strength and power, resist to look weak.  

Key Motivation

Want to prove their strength and resist weakness, to be self-reliant, to dominate and control the environment.

Parenting Tips

1. Treat them in an equal position with adults. They are more likely to listen and co-operate if you treat them like an adult.
2. They are lack of patience. Communicate with them should straight to the point for their easy understanding.
3. Avoid covering things not to tell them as they appeal to openness and trust.

9. The Mediator

Rita is a nice person or a peacemaker, always like day-dreaming, and a lack of concentration.  She wants to create harmony in her environment in which no one is disturbed. It is no surprise she can get along almost with everyone.  Some people might describe her as a sponge that can absorb any differences.  It seems like everything doesn’t matter to her as long as there are no conflicts.

Key Motivation

The drive is laziness.  Avoiding conflicts and tension, to preserve things as they are, to resist whatever would upset or disturb the harmony. 

Parenting Tips

1. ​They are easy to forget things. Keep a paper and a pen handy for the convenience to drop notes to remember things.
   
2. They concern more of others and less of themselves. Encourage them to express their ideas for what do they like and dislike. They have to learn to take care of their needs.

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One (Perfectionist)

Two (Giver)

Three (Performer)

Four (Tragic of Romance)

Five (Observer)

Six (The Loyal Skeptic)